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  • Writer's pictureNemi

Make Soup, It's Soup Time

“Nemi, whatever are you doing in the culinary section?”


I’m making soup, didn’t you read the title?


So, if you’re like me, you try to eat seasonally, and at the end of winter you have a lot of roots (read: carrots) left over and you have no idea what to do with them, your solution, my friend, is to make soup. Lots of soup.


Now if you’re also like me, you hate soup. I hate soup. Why the hell did I decide to make soup?


Well, I like the soups at restaurants, but homemade soups don't seem to turn out quite good.


Y’all know what I mean.


Also, if you’re like my parents, you are terrified of the virus and won’t order takeout.


So there goes the good soup supply.


As a result, I decided to use all of my three brain cells, collectively, to try and make good soup.


And I succeeded. Otherwise I wouldn’t be sharing it. Maybe.


LEtS MakE sOme SoUP.


I eyeballed everything, so you can probably also eyeball everything and it’ll turn out fine.


Ingredients

  • Some oil/butter/grease/whatever

  • A little more than half an onion

  • Some things of garlic

  • About 4-5 carrots

  • Half a cauliflower (you can skip the cauliflower and add more carrots if you want)

  • One and a half bunches of Kale (yes, Kale, I swear it's not horrible)

  • A few things of celery, or half a zucchini, or something. Something that isn’t a root, but use your common sense. Don't use an eggplant, or a cucumber. Use soup vegetables.

  • One (1) tomato

  • A handful of creamy nuts (like walnuts, cashews, pecans, etc. not hard nuts like peanuts or almonds)

  • Salt. You always need salt.



You’re gonna need a pot and a blender. And a plate. Just trust me. Alright, lets go.


Chop all your vegetables however you like. You’re gonna blend ‘em anyway, just keep in mind the smaller you cut ‘em the faster they cook. Take your nuts and put ‘em in a bowl, pour hot water into the same bowl. This is gonna soften the nuts.


Put the oil/butter/whatever in the pot. Wait ‘till it heats up. Then throw in the chopped onion and saute ‘till its translucent. That means they’re halfway see-through.


Afterwards, you’re gonna throw in the rest of the vegetables, whatever you chose. Add salt how you like. Saute them for a bit, then put in enough water so that it covers everything fully and a bit more. Now cook it ‘till everything is soft (put a lid on it to make it go faster). Or you can do a little bit less, if you like the soup crunchy.


Now separate the veggies from the broth. Keep the broth, you’re gonna need it. I did this by fishing out the vegetables with a ladle. There’s probably a better way to do this but i’m not a cook, I’m a musician.


Let the veggies cool so you don't kill your blender.


If you spread them out on a plate, this happens faster (see I told you you’d need a plate).


While you’re waiting for veggie cooldown, take the nuts and put them in the blender, along with the water you soaked them in. Blend it.


Now sit around and wait for the veggies to cool down all the way.


Okay, now that the veggies are cool, throw them in the blender and blend them with the nuts.


If it's not working put some broth in there too. Take the blade out and pour the vegetable-nut sauce into the broth. Now stir it together. Put some water into the blender and shake it around, this way you clean the blender of all the vegetable-nut sauce, then pour that in the pot too. If it still looks like sauce, add water ‘till it looks like soup. Or you can drink sauce. I don't care. Taste it and if it's not salty enough add more salt at this point.


Heat that up till it's boiling a little bit. Not a whole lot, I mean it's not the end of the world if you boil it a whole bunch but all you need is just a little (again, put a lid on it to make it go faster).


Take your kale and put that in. It's gonna look like a lot, but it's not, I promise. Put the tomato in there too. Not whole, chop it up first, but put the tomato in there.


Keep cooking it ‘till the kale is cooked all the way through. It should take about five minutes.


Now eat your nice soup.


Anemone out ;)


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